This past Saturday my roommate JD asked his girlfriend Liz to marry him. Her first response? I’m told that she quite literally jumped for joy–on him! Even typing that makes me smile. They plan to be married this summer. I can’t tell you how happy I am for them. I’ve known both JD and Liz for nearly seven years, going back to when I was a freshman at FSU. I first met JD through the Navigators after I had been in town for only a few days. Liz and I were in the same BCM Fish School our first semester. Later on, in a convoluted way, I was actually the person who introduced Liz to the Navs. So, I’m going to take minor credit for the fact that these two ever even met. Very minor.

Side note: Apparently I’m Hitch for alumni “never-daters.” When I move into a house these days one of my single roommates will “find” a lady, begin dating her, get engaged and get married, all in less than one year. That’s now happened twice in consecutive years. Ridiculous. Awesome, but completely ridiculous.

With all sincerity, congratulations, JD and Liz!

Expressing Joy was originally published on Andrew Ledwith's blog.
© 2004-2011 Andrew Ledwith. All rights reserved.

This past Monday night my old roommate Luke got engaged to my next-door neighbor Katie. Both of them are campus ministers with the Navigators at FSU, so as you can imagine this news is making waves in our community. (If you’re getting a weird sense of déjà  vu let me assure you it’s well-founded.)

I found out about their engagement Tuesday morning from my roommate Joe. He claimed he told me mostly so that I could tell our roommate JD. Joe hoped if the news came from me that I would be the one to receive JD’s all-but-certain hug. You see, Joe isn’t exactly what you’d call the mushy type. JD, on the other hand, is much more in touch with his emotions. Knowing this, I like to instigate moments of faux conflict between the two of them.

Later that morning I emailed both of my roommates about paying rent. JD’s response was short, sweet and not at all germane to my message, but I used it to my advantage. Enjoy.

Me: [My original message about rent.]
JD: Luke and Katie are engaged!!! :)
Me: Engaged to be MARRIED!!! =D
JD: aaaaaaaaaaaah!! :) :)
Joe: If I could punch you through the Internet, I would. Andrew, we might need to talk to the Embarq guy to see if we can make that happen. [Stuff regarding my original message.] I hope you girls are doing well today.

Worth it.

Congratulations, Luke and Katie!

Expressing Excitement was originally published on Andrew Ledwith's blog.
© 2004-2011 Andrew Ledwith. All rights reserved.

On the first Sunday of May two of my good friends, Kyle Kozloski and Nicki Nedelisky, got married in Ocala, Florida. Now, I know that I’ve been to a lot of weddings in the past eighteen months, but this one was special. No, I wasn’t in it, but I felt as much a part of this wedding as any other, including the ones in which I’ve had a role.

You see, this past year Kyle was one of my two roommates and Nicki one of my three next-door neighbors. On top off all that, all of us were campus ministers with The Navigators. When we all moved in to the respective sides of our hole-in-the-wall duplex in August ’07 Kyle and Nicki weren’t even dating, much less thinking of marriage. In short, I got to witness these chapters of their love story unfold from a very unique angle. Before I become too far removed from it, I’d like to try to tell some of that story.

I remember a night in the spring after Kyle and Nicki were engaged. My roommates, Luke and Kyle, and I were getting ready for bed. The wedding was drawing near, and Luke commented that it had been fun to watch Kyle and Nicki fall in love. I immediately disagreed with him, which they both thought was hysterical. But I was being half serious. Don’t misunderstand me. Once they fell it was lots of fun, but the falling was not fun at all. The months leading up to their dating relationship were filled with suspense. Will they? Won’t they? Each week Luke, Kyle and I had a roommate meeting where we could share how we were struggling or how we needed prayer. In the fall those meetings more often than not featured Kyle lamenting over the proper way for him to relate to Nicki, whether he should start a second dating relationship with her, and what that would mean if he did.

Alyssa and Helen, Nicki’s roommates from this past year, probably agree with me to some extent. That fall they started calling Kyle “the elephant,” referring to the old expression “there’s an elephant in the room.” I imagine a typical conversation back in the fall might have sounded a little like this.

Nicki (getting off the phone): Kyle’s going to come over for a little bit, okay?
Helen (big smile): Oh, the elephant’s coming over!
Alyssa (big smile): Oh, the elephant’s coming over!
Nicki (small smile): Yeah, the elephant’s coming.

I can relate to that elephant feeling (though — and let’s be clear about this — I would never refer to Nicki as such). She and Kyle were fond of watching The Office together in our living room on her laptop, which generally signaled my cue to exit to the back of the house. Not only do I think The Office isn’t funny at all, but, you know, I didn’t want to be the third wheel on their fake-date. More than once Nicki had to assure me that it would be fine if I stayed out in the living room with them while they watched, to which I politely thanked her and made some excuse for needing to be at my computer (thank God for desktops).

This kind of thing went on for months. I have to admit, I had no idea how the story was going to end. As a rule I tend to think that most stories will have a happy ending so long as I’m not one of the principle characters. But with this I wasn’t sure. But I remember the exact moment I knew this story was going to have a happy ending. It was the beginning of December. It may very well have been December 1, because I think we were all celebrating Kyle’s brother’s birthday. I don’t recall how he did it, but Kyle really injured his back that day. Kyle has had chronic back trouble, but on this day he was in absolute agony, barely able to move.

So Ross’ party had given way to tending to Kyle and trying to get him comfortable. It was getting late and the birthday party crew had dwindled to myself, Ross, Nicki and Kyle. Nicki had gone to her side of the duplex to get something, a heating pad I think, and when she returned I stopped her at our door. Thinking that I was being considerate, I told her that I thought Ross and I could handle things if she wanted to go home and get some sleep. Looking past me, she responded saying, “I just want to take care of him,” and rushed into the house.

It wasn’t just her words, and it wasn’t just how she said them. She had a look on her face and in her eyes, a look that I can really only describe as a mothering look, a look that I hadn’t at all expected to see. But there it was. It was love. Because he was hurting so was she. I stood there in the doorway struck dumb by the scene, for it isn’t everyday you see that sort of thing. And even though they were still only fake-dating, that’s when I knew this story was going to end well.

They began real-dating not long after that, a week or two later. That came as both a joy and a relief to me. Finally! Of course, with this came a new question. When were they going to get engaged? And no, it wasn’t too early to begin asking. Saying they wanted to be a couple again was saying they wanted to be a couple for good. Allow me emphasize my point. I remember one afternoon in early January, before they were engaged. Luke, Kyle and I were in our kitchen. I was eating lunch. Then this little conversation happened.

Kyle: Nicki and I were talking and we might be getting married in April.
Me: [Pause for effect, then, incredulously, without looking up from my sandwich...] Whatever.
Luke: [High-pitched laughter, either at me or Kyle, possibly both.]

A few days later they were engaged. It was over MLK weekend. I’ve heard that story a hundred times now but I could never do it justice. Soon after they set a date of May 4. In the time between the “Yes” and the “I do” they were racing around putting the pieces of the wedding together. I would come home and find them on our couch, both on their laptops, with all sorts of everything laying out in front of them, making calls or talking through details. Most of my memory of those spring months, as far as wedding prep goes, has to do with hearing of their latest completed step and their next big hurdle. Kyle’s roommate meeting talks turned from lament to a strange mix of stress and peace: stress over the work that still needed to be done and peace over the woman he was marrying. Those months seemed to go by very fast. I can see why most couples don’t try to plan a wedding in such a small amount of time.

I remember the last night Kyle was my roommate. It was April 30. The FSU Nav staff, sans Kyle and Nicki, had just come back from a region-wide planning meeting in Gainesville. Kyle was going to Ocala the next morning where he’d be through the wedding day. The three of us went out for a late dinner at Gordo’s, a little Cuban restaurant near our house. It was all a little surreal. It was strange to think about the fact that he wasn’t going to be my roommate ever again, stranger still to think about who his next roommate was going to be! It had been a great year together. To not only be living together but to all be campus ministers for the same ministry together was very special. I’m going to miss it.

The wedding weekend, so far as I could tell, went exactly as they planned it. I got to be a part of so much more than I ever thought I would. Like I said, I wasn’t in the wedding, but you wouldn’t have known it. I went to Kyle’s bachelor party, played ultimate Frisbee with he and his groomsmen, and even attended the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner (I received a last-second special invite from Nicki). To top it all off, instead of staying with my friend at his parents’ home, I got to stay in the hotel with the groomsmen. And not just any room — Kyle’s room. Yep, it was me, Kyle, Joe Landon, JD and Ross. (Fold-out couch for the win!) I continue to feel very blessed to have been a part of so much of that weekend.

The ceremony was very special. Nicki was such a beautiful bride! Their wedding included some moments I don’t think I’ll ever forget. Like when little Benjamin Wirgau, who’s possibly the cutest five-year-old ever, came in right on cue waving his little bell saying, “The bride is coming! The bride is coming!” Or how at least half a dozen times I thought Kyle and Nicki were going to kiss before they were told to. Or how the whole ceremony seemed to be happening around the bride and groom, that when you looked at them looking at each other it was as though they were already somewhere else entirely. But even if I forget all that, I’ll never forget their kiss! You have to know that these two had never kissed on the lips before. You also have to know that the groomsmen put me in charge of timing their kiss because we were betting on how long it would be (I know, men are twisted). That smooch was officially 12.23 seconds! I’m smiling just thinking about it. Those crazy kids.

The newlyweds were openly playful at their reception. Quite appropriately their first dance was to Ella Fitzgerald’s “At Last.” It was a classy reception, complete with a song from High School Musical (to which everyone seemed to know the corresponding dance). Cheesy Disney music not withstanding, it really was one heck of a party. We all danced the night away, and before too long Kyle and Nicki made their exit under a canopy of bubbles, off to a Jamaican honeymoon.

I said at the start that I felt very much a part of this wedding despite the fact that I didn’t hold any role in it. I think that’s because this is the first wedding in which I knew both the bride and the groom this well. In fact, I’ve only been to two other weddings where I’d even met both bride and groom prior to the ceremony, and in each case I knew one far better than the other. That’s what made this a unique experience for me. I’ve known both Kyle and Nicki for six years now. This past year I was privileged to get to know them both much better as fellow laborers and dear friends. I don’t typically express happiness with tears, but I had them on my face for most of their ceremony. Truly, I couldn’t be happier for them.

My Roommate and My Neighbor was originally published on Andrew Ledwith's blog.
© 2004-2011 Andrew Ledwith. All rights reserved.

Does This Make Him My Cousin-In-Law? – Whoa, déjà vu. Only a week ago I was writing these very words for someone else. Congratulations are in order for my cousin Beka, who recently got engaged. Now, the details that I have regarding this engagement are few and far between. I was wasting some of my morning on Facebook and noticed that Beka had updated her profile with a shot of an engagement ring, presumably her own. Upon further inspection of her profile I discovered that, according to her “Relationship Status”, she is indeed engaged. Now, I do know that both she and her beau are both over in Australia on a mission trip at the moment, so there should be a fun story that accompanies this revelation.

I’ve tried to write this paragraph three or four times and each time it comes out wrong. It’s just me being selfish and anxious, but I think the feelings are valid. You see, this is the second of my younger cousins to get engaged in the past year (one on each side of my family). No doubt about it, I’m happy for them both and I think it’s great. But I’m not going to lie: I’m dreading the “when are you going to find someone and settle down” crap that is likely to ensue during every family reunion from now on.

Like I said, totally selfish. Bad note to end on. Seriously, I’m very stoked for you Beka. Congratulations!

Job Situation – I’m still unemployed, though I have made the final cut for a few different jobs in Tallahassee. My friend Kristin asked me today if by final cut they meant “Publishers Clearing House” final cut or “it’s down to you and this other guy” final cut. And the truth is I don’t know and I don’t want to know. Regardless, I’ll find out next week.

Psych – If you’re like me and you’re addicted to Law & Order: SVU reruns that seem to always be showing on USA Network then you’ve likely seen the commercials for this new show called Psych. Now, I’ll be frank with you. The first reason this show caught my attention was because the commercials played “Blister in the Sun” by the Violent Femmes in the background. But I officially became impressed on the fourth of July. My sister Alison was going through the OnDemand programming on my parents’ digital cable (yet another reason why I can’t have cable TV in my house: if I had digital cable and OnDemand I’d have no friends) and found that the pilot episode was available for viewing the week before the series premiered. So we watched it, and now I feel obliged to inform you that you should too.

First of all, if you don’t already know, it’s a detective show. The main character has amazing detective skills, but he’s not working as one. When he helps the cops solve a case they want to know how he got all the information, thinking he could be involved. No one believes that he’s just that good, so he says he’s psychic to add credibility to his story. I know, sounds lame. But it’s like watching a Sherlock Holmes novel. Even the main character’s partner is a doctor, just like a certain Watson. It’s clever, it’s funny, it’s worth your time. Sadly, it premiered Friday night at 10 PM, at which time the majority of the boob tube watching public was probably seeing Pirates of the Caribbean II. But maybe in future weeks you can give it a chance. It’s a great show.

The Sports World – You’ve got to be kidding me. The next four days are going to be great if you’re a sports fan. The final two World Cup matches (picks: Germany and Italy), the men’s and women’s finals at Wimbledon (picks: Federer and Henin-Hardenne), the Home Run Derby (pick: Ortiz), and the MLB All-Star Game (pick: NL).

The rest – Despite the aforementioned sporting madness, this weekend couldn’t go fast enough. I just want it to be a weekday again. I want to finish this job search once and for all. I feel like I’m close, but I can’t do anything for the next two days but wait. I used to think I was a patient man but this situation has shown me how much I want things on my timetable.

Cousin-In-Law was originally published on Andrew Ledwith's blog.
© 2004-2011 Andrew Ledwith. All rights reserved.

The “Eric W. Schwartz” Part of the Program – Congratulations are in order for my longtime friend Eric, who as of this past Saturday is engaged to be married. I have known Eric since I was six years old and going to St. Mark’s Elementary School back in south Florida. He was my closest friend all the way through middle school and remains a man I highly respect and admire. I couldn’t be happier for him.

One of his most redeeming qualities is his sense of humor. Here is an IM I received from him earlier today:

The W’s are taking over the government (well, sort of). W (the President) has appointed W (the artist Michael W. Smith) to be the Vice Chair of the President’s Council on Service and Civic Participation. It appears that Smitty and President Bush are good friends, and as we all know, friends are friends forever.

And yes, Eric’s middle name is William, meaning that eventually he will be part of this government takeover. Trust me, it could be worse.

Job Search – I have found a surprising number of new job openings to apply to this week. Those job opening have yet to find me, but I am much more optimistic about the whole situation this week than I was last week. Also, I am beginning to look more seriously at options outside of Tallahassee, though my preference is still to remain there.

NBA Draft – This was so awesomely bad it’s hard to put into words. In fact, I’m going to let ESPN columnist Bill Simmons (who earlier this month became Mark Cuban’s new hero) do most of the work for me, quoting from his amazing Draft Diary X. By the way, outside of the contributions made by Peter Gammons, who is currently incapacitated due to a brain aneurysm, there is nothing on ESPN.com worth reading outside of the work of Bill Simmons. There, I said it.

8:59 – The unequivocal highlight of the draft: Patrick throws it to the podium for Utah’s pick, only Stern hasn’t emerged from his secret lair yet, followed by Patrick filling time with “Where’d he go?” jokes, then Stern emerging, taking a dramatic pause and saying, “Dan, I was sitting in the back listening to your pithy comments.” He actually seems ticked. Dan quickly fires back with an awkward “I like Paul Tagliabue better” joke. I feel like they’re orchestrating this just to liven up my diary. It’s too good to be true.

9:15 – This is awkward: They’re discussing reasons why Marcus Williams slipped (character issues, out of shape, the laptop scandal), and, umm, he’s sitting right there. And he can hear everything. Umm, guys? He’s right there. Guys? Guys?

9:36 – There are those moments in sports when you expect something great, and then it actually happens. And then there are those rare moments in sports when you expect something great, and something even greater happens. This was one of those moments: The Knicks on the clock, the crowd pushing for Marcus Williams, and then …

–Stern: “With the 20th pick, the New York Knicks select … Renaldo Balkman.”

(Crowd explodes in horror.)

–Stern (over the boos): “Renaldo is not here.”

–Patrick (without missing a beat): “And it’s probably a good thing.”

(Shot of a beaten-down Spike Lee laughing hysterically.)

That was fantastic. Everyone kept e-mailing me to write about Isiah and the Knicks last week … what else was there to say? OF COURSE Isiah was meant to coach this team as his final job in the NBA before retiring to a life of greeting people at casinos and doing informercials. If somebody clogs your toilet, you ask him to clean up the mess. That’s just the way life works. I’m telling you, we’re going to remember the Isiah/Knicks Era the same way we remember things like Enron, the Hindenberg and the Bay of Pigs. It’s reached that level. I don’t know what else to say. Honestly. I have Knicks fans e-mailing me every day asking me if it’s OK to root against their own team. What else can you say at this point?

(Wait, I know … Renaldo Balkman!)

10:20 – The Mavs take Maurice Ager at No. 28. … Ager walks up to the stage in a triple-breasted, oversized beige suit, goes to shake hands with Stern and immediately gets whistled for a foul on Dwyane Wade.

I have to admit, I hate watching drafts. I don’t know how I always get sucked into watching them. Especially this year, since the Heat didn’t even have a single draft pick (their first round pick was held by the Lakers from the Shaq trade, their second round pick somehow ended up in Toronto). I think I stayed tuned just so I could see if New York blew it, and it certainly appears as though they did. I have to tell you, after all the years that the Knicks had the last laugh against the Heat it feels great to be able to laugh at the plight of New York basketball.

I’m really not the person to ask when it comes to who did best in the draft, but I will say this. I think Orlando drafting J.J. Redick was a great pick. They have such a young, talented team. I’m going to call it now, the Magic will make the playoffs next year and will be no pushover once there.

The rest – I find it ironic and infuriating that my sister is whining about finding a summer job when she has been looking for two days. If I have to listen to her whine and moan all weekend I’m going to go out of my mind. Hopefully at least one of us will go see Superman Returns this weekend so I’ll have a three-hour respite. Maybe we’ll both go see it at different times and I’ll have six hours of relief. Or maybe one of us will get hired. Yeah, that’s probably the better thing to hope for.

The W’s Are Taking Over was originally published on Andrew Ledwith's blog.
© 2004-2011 Andrew Ledwith. All rights reserved.